ARFID and the Holiday Table: How to Support a Child Who Struggles With Eating

Many children eagerly count down the days until the final school bell rings, signaling the start of the holidays. Holidays are filled with special traditions, excitement, and joyful time with family. Since holidays often center around food, this season can be especially challenging for children with Avoidant Food Intake Restrictive Disorder (ARFID). If the holiday table brings anxiety and conflict, you are not alone. This blog will explore ways to support your child with compassion and confidence while still enjoying the holiday season.

ARFID is Not Picky Eating

ARFID is an eating disorder that significantly limits the amount or types of food a child eats. Unlike other eating disorders, children with ARFID do not have concerns about weight or body shape. Common symptoms include:

• Limiting variety of foods or eliminating entire food groups
• Sensory sensitivities including textures, smells, colors, appearance of food
• Little to no interest in eating or appetite
• Fears of choking, vomiting, or allergic reactions
• Failure to gain weight or weight loss
• Fatigues, dizziness, or developmental delays caused by nutritional deficiencies

While many children go through picky eating phases, the extreme dietary restrictions in AFRID can lead to serious medical, nutritional, and psychosocial problems that interfere with daily life. 

Holiday Anxiety and ARFID: Why Mealtimes Can Be Tough

Food is often the centerpiece of holiday celebrations, with special once-a-year meals featuring dishes outside your child’s “safe foods” list. Well-meaning comments like:

• “I think you’ll like this. Just try it!”
• “You used to love this”
• “Just take one bite”

Can unintentionally increase your child’s shame and anxiety. This often leads to refusal, shutting down, or meltdowns. Children with ARFID are usually aware their diet is different from their peers, and drawing attention to it may make things worse. 

Strategies for Managing ARFID During the Holidays

1. Bring your child’s safe foods

You don’t need to apologize or explain bringing safe foods to family gatherings. Familiar foods reduce distress and help your child focus on enjoying time with others, reducing mealtime anxiety.

2. Talk to family and friends ahead of time

Let loved ones know about your child’s challenges before celebrations. Simple explanations like, “Some foods make him/her feel worried right now, so he/she may not eat certain foods,” often lead to understanding and support. 

3. Shift your focus

While meals are important, holidays are about more than just food. Encourage your child to enjoy games, crafts, movies, or other non-food activities to foster connection and joy. 

4. Consider getting feeding therapy support

Feeding therapy with specialists such as psychologists, occupational therapists, or speech-language pathologists trained in ARFID can help your child expand their diet and reduce mealtime stress. Therapy often focuses on addressing sensory sensitivities, reducing anxiety through gradual food exposures, and helping parents reduce accommodations. 

What the Holidays Are Really About

As you move through the holiday season, remember that your child’s well-being, not the dinner table, is what truly matters. Prioritizing connection, reducing pressure, and creating an emotionally safe environment can equip your child with the space they need to cope, participate, and enjoy the holidays in their own way. With understanding, preparation, and supportive strategies, families navigating ARFID can experience greater ease, more meaningful moments, and a holiday season defined by compassion rather than conflict. 

If you need additional guidance or specialized ARFID treatment, the Houston Anxiety and Wellness Center has trained professionals ready to support you and your family!